As a single man I have seen many attempts to be quirky in my lifetime. Many think that it's all about throwing keywords around, "omg im so feral, so chaotic!". Some think it's presentation- these come closer to the spirit of it.

Once Upon A Katamari may be one of the most genuinely bizarre and quirky games I've played, and all in a really endearing way. It's astounding how well the game feels quirky in a really timeless way. I was really preparing for some sort of weird zoomer take on the King of All Cosmos as he tries to be a Twitch streamer or something. Instead, what I got was a charmingly timeless sense of humor- he's just a weirdo.

The Weirdness of Katamari

OK, some introductions. In case you've missed Katamari during the Damacy Dormancy of recent years, the core premise is simple: roll around a ball and collect stuff. Then, you add in fun settings, an amazing soundtrack and genuine weirdo characters like the King of All Cosmos and you get one of the most water-tight hits in gaming.

Once Upon A Katamari plays with the formula in a lot of fun ways. Obviously, the gameplay variation comes from the rules of inherent levels: In this one, you wanna roll up as much as you can in 10 minutes, while in the next one you might need to hit a target of 300 items rolled up before the timer runs out. But the game also takes care to have fun with how you interact with these stages. In one stage, my Katamari was replaced with a Tumbleweed, and now a gust of wind was liable to send me flying in the wrong direction.

It's a great fusion of writing and gameplay because of how it comes together. In one of the game's many time-based stages, I had to roll up dinosaurs to impress the King of All Cosmos. Despite the stage somehow having cavemen in it, imagine my surprise when I rolled up a Dimetrodon and the game explicitly showed me it didn't count as a dinosaur. As a lifelong dinosaur nerd I couldn't help but burst out laughing. Cavemen? Sure. But get those dirty Synapsids out of here. There's not even a funny punchline for it, the game just doesn't count it, which is objectively funnier than some kind of protracted rant.

The game is dripping in charm because it's very dedicated to going its own way with things. Every stage feels whimsical in the sense that it literally feels like the time periods were decided on a whim. It's definitely helped by the all-encompassing presence of the King of All Cosmos. He's a pain in the butt for the most part, but he does it in such an endearing way that I honestly can't wait to find out what new way he's going to inconvenience me with his chatter.

It also helps that the actual act of rolling things up is fun. The new Freebies power ups are great, especially when it comes to clutch plays like stopping time (and subsequently, the timer) to buy yourself a few more seconds of rolling up gold dust to hit that S rank. There's also a new multiplayer Katamari Ball mode that lets you compete with friends or bots for cosmetic rewards, though it's a great example of how much Once Upon a Katamari is carried by its humor- just rolling around with no special rules or dialogue doesn't hit quite the same.

Once Upon A Katamari Verdict

If you like your games absolutely dripping in fun, give Once Upon A Katamari a shot. It's a weird game through and true- in fact you're more likely to find friction with the game's weird twin stick control scheme before you realize how much fun you're having being a lonely rolling star.

Your biggest obstacle might be its difficulty- progression is locked behind Crowns, which means eventually you'll need to actually lock in and start hunting collectible Crowns instead of just chasing level S-ranks. But you know what the best part about crown hunting is? More Katamari.

In a world of faux-quirkiness and performative weirdos, Katamari feels like a genuine oddball. The good news? It knows how to let the good times roll. 

Final Score: 8/10